


The Bombs Bursting in Air

by Willbakefordean



Series: Home Sweet Home [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, M/M, Male Lactation, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, mentions of mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-07-04
Packaged: 2018-04-07 15:37:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4268823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willbakefordean/pseuds/Willbakefordean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean is healing and he Cas and Marigold celebrate the fourth of July, not realizing how it will affect their small family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Bombs Bursting in Air

**Author's Note:**

> This is meant in the most respectful of ways and in support of all of those for whom PTSD is a reality of every day life.

Dean had been home for a little over five weeks now, having spent two of them in the hospital. He was healing well, enjoying spending his medical leave with Cas and was inseparable from Marigold. He had taken naturally to caring for the almost two month old baby girl, making up for missing her birth and the first two weeks of her life. Cas loved to watch him with her and dreaded the day Dean’s leave would end and he could be deployed again. Maybe he would get to stay home with them and work out of DC for a while, Cas could hope.

They were sitting on a blanket in the middle of an open park and it was getting dark. They had come to celebrate the fourth of July with some of Dean’s squad. Benny, Ash, Garth, and Charlie, along with their spouses and families were on their own blankets around Dean and Cas’.  The fireworks were supposed to be fabulous and they were looking forward to Marigold’s first Independence Day experience. They were all dressed in red, white and blue, Marigold was fashionably patriotic in an adorable navy sundress covered with white stars and now a red sweater with white polka dots. She had a soft headband with a red, white, a blue flower turned to the side of her head.

Cas looked on as Dean talked to Marigold and made silly faces, never more grateful to live in a country where he and his family could have so much and he was proud that his husband protected it with such dedication and fervor. He was even more grateful that Dean was alive and home so they could celebrate as a family. It was not an easy life, worrying every time Dean was sent on a mission, but it was important and a privilege and it was part of what made up the love of his life, his Dean.

The banter came back and forth between the blankets as the friends and squad members teased and joked with one another. Marigold began to fuss so Dean scooted close to Cas and sat with his arm around his husband as he opened the flap on his nursing top and settled in to feed the sweet baby girl.

Cas loved the way Dean looked softly at him when he nursed their baby. He was so supportive of Cas and he had been even more tender with him after they watched the film of Marigold’s birth. Dean cried through the whole thing, the joy too much to contain and also grieving that he had missed it and was not there to support his _brave_ husband during the labor and delivery. It didn’t help that at the hardest points, Cas, in Bobby or Ellen’s arms, cried out for Dean. Still they were together now and two weeks ago Cas had his follow up checkup, clearing him to be in good health.  That night the two had made slow, sweet love, relearning what took the other apart and bringing them to tears for totally different reasons.

It was time for the fireworks to start and Dean told Cas he thought he should keep nursing the baby as they started in case she was frightened. Cas nodded and smiled as Dean leaned in and kissed him a little dirty, it would be a fun night when they got home, Cas imagined. He had no idea the turn the night would take in a moment, no one did.

The first rocket went up with the familiar thunk and everyone turned their eyes to the sky. Cas instinctively tightened his grip on Marigold, lest she be frightened and he felt a reassuring squeeze from Dean and a kiss on his cheek. Then holy hell broke loose.

As the firework hit it’s predetermined height and exploded, Cas felt Dean go rigid and grip his shoulder painfully tight. The next one hit before Cas had a chance to react. People were clapping and cheering in the dark and you could only see when the beautiful sparkles lit the sky. Dean cowered into Cas and shouted, “Cover, take cover, down down, down…INNNNCOMING!”

In slow motion Cas maneuvered Marigold from his breast to his shoulder and pulled Dean to his chest, protectively. He didn’t quite know what else to do, but Dean’s squad did. They moved instinctively, Benny sitting behind them and pulling both he and Cas to himself, wrapping his arms around them both. Charlie gingerly took the baby who was surprisingly quiet and handed her to Gilda, her wife. With two free hands now, Cas cradled Dean’s head as the rest of the men and Charlie, sat as close as physically possible and all reassured Dean that he was okay.  
Slowly, with both Cas and Benny whispering in his ears, Dean began to calm and relax from his anxiety attack. Cas grabbed a baby blanket from the bag and wiped the sweat from Dean’s soaked head and face. “It’s alright Dean, it’s just the fireworks, sweetheart,” Cas soothed softly. When Benny felt the tension leave Dean’s body, he released his grip and Charlie handed him a water bottle. Dean drank about half of it in one long pull. He seemed to come back to himself and the realization of what happened hit him.

Dean flushed red enough that Cas could see it happen even in the dark. Benny’s voice rang in before Cas could find the words, “Major, don’t you dare. It’s a fucking normal reaction the first time since you were hit. You are fine now and no one noticed. Even if they did, it’s happened to half the people on this lawn. Cowboy up and watch the rest of the show with Cas and Mari, hear!” Cas thought it was a bit harsh but when he looked at Dean, he seemed relieved, so Cas leaned into Dean and kissed him firmly on the lips. He hoped his kiss conveyed his pride in his husband’s bravery and understanding for what had occurred here tonight. Dean’s response to the kiss gave Cas the reassurance that it had.

Charlie passed the baby back to Dean, who kissed her and hugged her firmly to his chest. He pulled Cas down on the blanket with him and the three of them lay watching the final fireworks, Dean occasionally wincing, but staying calm and in control. They remained surrounded by Dean’s squad and Cas knew that this group of people, this family, certainly knew and experienced things he didn’t, or couldn’t.

He vowed in that moment that he would never take for granted the line in the national anthem that spoke of the bombs bursting in air, because he knew there were men and women who, through no choice of their own, couldn’t either.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to make this into a series...I'd love to hear your comments...


End file.
